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How to say ‘I value you’ without saying a word!

September 6, 2011
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time ticking away tick tockI was struck by the phrase “thank you for your time”. One day at work two separate people both ended their conversations with me by saying that very phrase, which really made me think about why time is seen as something so valuable…

Time is a very precious thing. Arguably we rarely, if ever, seem to have enough time to do everything and at any one moment there are often 101 different things that can be vying for our focus and demanding our attention. Efficiency is often a characteristic employers love, and something many of us strive for. The ability to multitask well is also particularly valued, or admired, as it means more can be done with every precious moment!

So, I think that’s exactly why it speaks volumes when you do give someone your time, because you’re saying “I value you”, without saying any words. We all know the feeling you get when someone’s talking to you but glancing at something, or someone, else every few seconds and the real difference it makes when someone gives you their undivided attention.

I think because there are so many different things that we could be doing at any given moment, when we do give someone our undivided attention, and don’t try to rush them so we can get on with other things, we are choosing to say “you are more important than the other 101 things I could be doing now” and in a busy world, that really does say a lot.

It’s also striking when I read about Jesus when He was on the earth, as the Son of God, He must’ve had any number of things He could’ve been doing at each moment. But, we read again and again of how Jesus gave His time and attention to people, particularly people who others didn’t bother with (e.g. John 4:1-30). I think that speaks volumes about the fact that Jesus came to earth for the sake of people, and they were His priority.

I don’t know about you, but I know that I can far too easily lapse into thinking about a long ‘to do’ list and what else I have to get on with, BUT just having those two people thank me for giving them my time reminded me of how something seemingly small like that can really show care and concern for someone and it really encouraged me to check my priorities. I wonder if it got you thinking too?

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19 Comments leave one →
  1. September 6, 2011 1:26 pm

    For sometime I have been living one day at a time… I wake up in the morning and allow the day to begin and to be in the moment on that day…time is relative… I mean if someone made the effort to seek help then I would in return make the effort for them…Not watch my time and if I was delayed by a few minutes at a another engagement or appointment then I can only hope that he/she would understand….

  2. September 6, 2011 2:19 pm

    As a personal development coach it is essential to make myself present to my client, bringing myself totally into the present moment, and removing all distractions so you can focus on being with them totally. I make sure i do the same whenever i’m with anybody.

  3. September 6, 2011 2:43 pm

    If Time/Space is actually a delusion as some folk now think then what exactly are we giving folk when we give our ‘time’ – something to ponder on. Maybe our consciousness as a manifestation of our love?

  4. September 6, 2011 3:20 pm

    Great post given that I have been ranting to friends about valuing time. I guess one can say that someone who does not value your time therefore does not value you?

  5. September 6, 2011 3:36 pm

    you never know when or how you will touch a life….I find i purposely look up at people as I pass them by and I smile..and most times i get a smile in return,,that one smile might have made their day a bit brighter…and maybe they will now share a smile too….change the world one person at a time…..nice post …As always…XOXOXOXO

  6. September 6, 2011 3:47 pm

    Something I have done for a lifetime is to look into the eye of the person I am speaking with. Including my kids as they grew up. No matter what I was doing, I tried to stop and hear them.
    Our smile is our greatest tool.

  7. September 6, 2011 4:20 pm

    Time to be present is a valuable present! Thanks for taking time to write this post!

  8. September 6, 2011 4:40 pm

    time is precious, isn’t it? only because we are constantly running out of it…at least that’s what we think….that’s why spending time with the ones you love is so precious…nice post

    Cheers!
    SUB

  9. September 7, 2011 1:22 am

    I definitely think about this! As a homeschool mom I easily get pulled into a thousand different directions which can easily eat up so much of my time. Time is valuable and it certainly does need to be carefully measured!

  10. September 7, 2011 5:37 am

    I read somewhere that the one of the greatest gifts you can give a person is your full attention, your time, for it is your gift if self. During that time you are giving that person, you, and in a world of multitasking when we all seem distracting and in other places at one time, to just give someone a moment, uninterrupted, can be a precious gift that shows just how much you value them as a person.

    Very good point about who Jesus gave his time too while here on earth. Definitely makes me do some reflecting. Thanks 🙂

  11. September 7, 2011 9:10 am

    Time is the one resource we can’t get back…

  12. September 7, 2011 9:29 am

    This is such a good post, the topic is so very important. I think especially in this time of such high internet usage, we can easily fail or forget how to simply be present with those around us. We often are too busy checking our cell phones or Facebook pages and though we are with someone else, we aren’t really there. Such an excellent post, thank you!:)

  13. September 7, 2011 2:02 pm

    I agree I agree I agree =D With internet and social netowkring etc, it’s really hard to value simple things such as someone taking some time out to give you their undivided attention

  14. September 7, 2011 5:18 pm

    Time is something which is in short supply nowadays. People are more into gadgets than into people, we have forgotten to sit still and give others our full attention, I do it too. Great post

  15. September 9, 2011 6:11 am

    Truly mike…coz TIME NEVER RETURNS!…keep posting!!<3:)

  16. September 10, 2011 10:44 am

    Ouch….hmmm…it struck me. We often say that praying is ‘wasting time with God’ and it’s so true. Most often, I’d find myself very busy and don’t even have time to truly stop and listen or perhaps I just choose the ones I’d like to do…and spend time with.

    I loved how you’ve exposed the value of quality time in this frenetic world. Thanks 🙂 this is a wonderful post.

  17. November 21, 2011 4:25 pm

    standing on the beach of the sands of time, each wave washes away a grain of sand,and we sink deeper into the surf. giving a grain of sand to someone is like handing them a life saver. a stepping stone on their path to heaven god bless you can have some of my sand.

  18. Janaki Nagaraj permalink
    November 21, 2011 4:55 pm

    Well written….:-)

  19. November 21, 2011 4:59 pm

    We use this one a lot, it was something that we were always taught as children to use, to show the appreciation that someone had given us a moment. It’s so important to show people that you do appreciate and it shows you care, I’ve often seen people who’ve been interupted get quite flustered or angry and those few words have taken the edge of them. Manners maketh man but they also go along way to appeasing people too 🙂 Great post. Second attempt and I changed my comment slightly in case the other one turns up 🙂

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